Episode Transcript
[00:00:14] Speaker A: Hello, friends, loyal listeners and bears everywhere. Welcome to the Sound barrier. That's right, the official podcast of Northeast State Community College. My name is Tom Wilson. I'm here today with Mackenzie Morgette. We're hosting this episode from the Entertainment Technology studio here in the Technical education complex. Thank you to Will McMoran, his great staff of students helping us out with this episode, as always today. Well, it's February. Valentine's Day approaches. That's right. Gotta express that love on. On Valentine's Day. And that's what this episode is. That's what this episode is about. Love. Whether you have it or you don't, or you're going through a bit of a heartbreak, whatever it is, love is still all around and still something we all need in this big old wide world. So that's what we're here to talk about. Valentine's Day and how we came to it, how we celebrate it, and a little bit of the history of what's going on with it.
[00:01:06] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, I had to do a little bit of digging in that myself just, you know, just to give us an idea of how we got to where we're at today with Valentine's Day. So I was always convinced, Tom, that Valentine's Day was always this love to celebrate someone special in your life. But it kind of looks like the Love Shrug holiday has this dark history behind it. And yeah, I found some of that during my digging.
So as it turns out, it begins with the legend of the execution of a Christian saint, Saint Valentine. And his death was ordered on February 14, 269 AD by Roman Emperor Claudius Gothicus. I think I'm pronouncing that name right. I hope I'm not butchering it. But 200 years later, after the execution of St. Valentine, a Roman bishop declared St. Valentine's Day known as the Feast of St. Valentine. Now, this was first held 496 A.D. so that's well over 200 years since St. Valentine's execution. Some historians speculate it was established by the Church to replace pagan practices around that time. And then eventually in the 14th and 15th centuries, it began to become associated with exclusively romantic love. And showing your appreciation for that special someone in your life. And, you know, a lot of, you know, speculation with history surrounding this because there are even some historians who believe that even the establishing it to be associated with romantic love in those 14th and 15th centuries may have been influenced by a Roman festival called Lupercalia. And that was like a two to three day event that would take place in middle of February. So February 13th through 15th, where they held rituals which were believed to help with fertility in their communities. And those actually ended up kind of being violent from what I was finding. There were goat and dog sacrifices. There were priests whipping people with animal skins.
[00:03:09] Speaker A: Good Lord.
[00:03:10] Speaker B: Yeah, it got pretty wild back then. So there's a bit of a violent history with that. So, you know, we're not sacrificing goats these days or, you know, marking our heads with the blood of our sacrifices to, you know, help with fertility or any other beliefs that stemmed from those practices. But today we celebrate with chocolates and sweet notes, maybe a social media post declaring your love for that special someone. So I will have to say I'm thankful that it's gotten lighter over the years since. Since its dark beginnings.
[00:03:42] Speaker A: Yeah, a little bit more fun. But I must say, if you're gonna be sentenced to death, Claudius Gothicus, that's the name of the guy. You probably want to do it. That's like, you couldn't make that up, I don't think. Claudius Gothicus.
[00:03:52] Speaker B: I know. What. Perfect name. Hard for someone to order an execution.
[00:03:58] Speaker A: Well, also, I checked a review, and there's so many accounts of history about how Valentine's Day came into being. One thing I also found was a poem by Geoffrey Chaucer called the Parliament of Fowls. So English professors out there at Northeast State, you listen, and you might want to check me on this, but I think the historians believe this was composed about 1380, 1382, somewhere in there, or late 14th century. But the Parliament of Fowls, also somewhat known as the assembly of fowls, it's about 700 lines. And Chaucer tells it. The narrator has this vision where he kind of goes into this trance and he passes through this landscape of nature, and he goes out through what Chaucer called the dark temple of Venus symbolism there to the bright sunlight. And he sees this large flock of birds who are gathered to choose their mates. And the birds have this huge parliamentary debate about how they're going to choose their mates. Well, it focuses a lot on these three male eagles who are trying to win the hand of this female eagle. And it goes back and forth through all these speeches and insults. And, yeah, it goes round and round for 700 lines. And mother Nature at the end decides, well, we're going to delay this one year because the female eagle doesn't want any of the three of these guys. The poem suggests she has the freedom to choose whatever eagle she wants. She doesn't have to choose one of these three eagles.
[00:05:14] Speaker B: Good for her.
[00:05:14] Speaker A: Exactly. That's how it kind of ends the dream and the narrator walks into spring. But yeah, kind of a different take on love. I would strongly encourage people to read the poem because it is very funny. The original is like in the old, Old English, so you might need to go to a translator and there are translators out there that will bring it into. To modern English standards, so it'll be a little bit more easy to understand. But go read that poem because it's very funny even to this day, and it's quite a satire on how people see themselves and it's kind of funny. Yeah.
[00:05:45] Speaker B: The Parliament of Fowls sounds ahead of its time, honestly.
[00:05:48] Speaker A: Yeah. Chaucer. Yeah, he wasn't. He wasn't bad. We're still reading him 800 years later, so. 700 years later.
[00:05:54] Speaker B: So you want to dive into what's happening around campus?
[00:05:57] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:05:58] Speaker B: This month, all the lovestruck events I can start off with. There's a Student Life is hosting a Valentine's Day club market that's going to be February 11th through the 12th, 10am through 2pm first floor of the Humanities building in that lobby, right. When you walk in through the doors there, you'll find plants, homemade arts and crafts, homemade food and more. Be sure to stop by, pick something up for your special someone or for yourself. No shame in that at all.
[00:06:27] Speaker A: Absolutely. Our Veterans and Military Student Success center, they are hosting a Valentine's day party on February 13th. It's from 11:30am to 1:30pm they're going to have games, candy, I'm sure a lot of fun activities that they always have over there. But our student veterans, family members here, certainly you're invited to attend. Come on, go on over there to the center. It's located right across from Atlanta, Hamilton Hall. Just go right across the street over there and hey, they'll welcome you with open arms, as always. Also, our friends from counseling services, they're hosting a table information space called Relationships Are Sweet. And this promotes healthy, romantic relationships among, you know, whomever. They're having that on the Kingsport campus at Archip and Blazer Wilson hall on February 17. Relationships are sweet will be on the Elizabethan campus on February 18, and it will be on the Blountville campus in the humanities building on February 19th. So just stop by there, see what they have to offer. I'm sure they'll talk about if you're in a good relationship, hey, celebrate it. You know, express that love. And maybe if you're in a not so good relationship. Go by and see what maybe is not something you want in a relationship. And if you're in one, maybe you think about changing or getting out of it altogether. But counseling services, always around wanting to help our students and our staff. And they do a great job.
[00:07:45] Speaker B: They truly do. And I think a lot of people, you know, tend to forget that those services exist for all students.
[00:07:52] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:07:52] Speaker B: They're always available. And that, you know, it can get pricey out in the real world when you're looking for counseling services and you don't always have insurance or maybe your insurance doesn't always meet the criteria or agree with. They don't accept it. So to have those free services here on campus available to students, take advantage of those services.
[00:08:12] Speaker A: Absolutely.
[00:08:13] Speaker B: I'm just kind of reading up on. You've gathered, Tom, a lot of Valentine's Day traditions around the world. And I've been kind of looking at this. I think one of the most interesting parts for me was that in Ghana, February 14, it's not just Valentine's Day, it's National Chocolate Day. That sounds amazing. You've written here that it's one of the largest producers of chocolate in the world.
[00:08:37] Speaker A: That is. That is the official story. Yes.
[00:08:39] Speaker B: Wow. Okay. And they create everything from chocolate hearts, cocoa foot creams, I would assume not edible.
[00:08:46] Speaker A: Yeah.
[00:08:49] Speaker B: The culture considers cocoa from which chocolate is derived, that cocoa bean to be a symbol of love and self care. So I like that. I like that one a lot. I think that's. That might be one of my favorites.
[00:09:00] Speaker A: Yeah. The applications you can come up with are so like inventive. So. Yeah. In Japan, the common tradition is women give the gifts on that date. Uh huh. It's kind of a two day holiday because one month after that, on March 14, Japan celebrates a holiday they call White Day. And on that day, men give the gifts.
[00:09:21] Speaker B: So everyone's getting a gift.
[00:09:23] Speaker A: Everybody's getting a nice gift. So it's just. They're 30 days apart, but everybody's getting something nice.
[00:09:28] Speaker B: Yeah. Here it's kind of a. You have your one chance. It's Valentine's Day. If you miss it, you messed up, you're in trouble.
[00:09:34] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:09:35] Speaker B: Italy. I'm reading this. Couples give each other bocce or perugina. I hope I'm not butchering those pronunciations. Ooh. These are sophisticated chocolate candies. I mean they do have very sophisticated sounds to them. So I would expect none less of the chocolates themselves. And they're wrapped in foil wrappers and they have love messages inside kind of Like a fortune cookie, but chocolate and Italian.
[00:10:00] Speaker A: Yes. Bocce perugina is a brand. I would suggest going to that website.
[00:10:06] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:10:06] Speaker A: And looking at the story of that because it's pretty amazing. And by the way, if you want to send us a box, our address is 2425 Highway 75, Blountville, Tennessee. That would be great. Bocce perugina.
[00:10:18] Speaker B: But anyway, with the love messages.
[00:10:20] Speaker A: With love messages inside and we will share some of them. But yeah, that, that is a. It's a very famous brand. It kind of took off in the small village of Perugina, Italy. It's very, very well known.
[00:10:32] Speaker B: Wow.
[00:10:32] Speaker A: And that's. It's very popular in Italy, or so I read.
[00:10:36] Speaker B: I will have to go to Italy someday and have a chocolate there. In Italy. That's the only way I know I've reached success in my life when I'm eating pasta in Italy. That's, you know, the same, the same thing. Sorry, it was a meme that I've seen kind of floating around, so I had to throw it out there, but. And then Poland, so. Oh, wow. Dried body parts. Okay, so I'm sorry, I'm reading this and my mind is reacting to it as I'm reading it. Couples in Poland like to visit Chelmno. Am I pronouncing that correctly? Where there are some relics, dried body parts of St. Valentine himself, of the man who was executed.
[00:11:14] Speaker A: That's the story. Oh, that is the story. You may listeners, you can take that for what you will.
[00:11:19] Speaker B: But that's a story.
[00:11:21] Speaker A: It is a little bit, yes.
[00:11:22] Speaker B: I don't know what the that is. Couples go there, it's known as the city of lovers, to ask the saint to bless their relationship. Interesting. Okay, very. And you know, apparently St. Valentine did have these special powers. I mean, it was speculated. It was, I guess a legend is when he was captured, awaiting his execution, he healed his jailer's blind daughter just by putting his hands on her.
[00:11:50] Speaker A: Oh, wow.
[00:11:51] Speaker B: And they still executed him.
[00:11:52] Speaker A: Terrible.
[00:11:53] Speaker B: I know. Like he couldn't have done anything enough. It just sounded like he was doomed from the start. Tom.
[00:11:59] Speaker A: Gothicus. Hey, a guy named Gothicus. You're gonna get no mercy there.
[00:12:05] Speaker B: No, not at all.
[00:12:06] Speaker A: In Germany, which Germany, Valentine's Day is relatively new to that country, or so I read. A tradition they have is they make these heart shaped gingerbread cookies and they're kind of infused with honey and they are known as Liebkuchen. They're adorned with icing and they have kind of messages of love on them and they're kind of hung from these kind of colorful ribbons that you give your significant other on Valentine's Day. They've taken off, I guess your. And they're. They're pretty popular, or so I read there in Germany. Egypt. I'll go real quick to Egypt here, which I found interesting. Egypt celebrates two days of love per year, February 14, which is kind of the traditional Valentine's Day for couples. And they also celebrate a second day ofLove on November 4, which is kind of more for your friends and your neighbors and your general, like, little community you live in. And it kind of celebrates love in a much kind of broader sense, kind of a community love for everyone, you know, in your family, like in and around your little village, which is interesting to do two days there in one. I did not get the historical background of that, but, hey, go Egypt. Two days of love.
[00:13:14] Speaker B: Yeah, we need more of that. Yes, I think.
[00:13:17] Speaker A: I agree.
[00:13:18] Speaker B: Some more love. Where is it? Where is the love?
[00:13:21] Speaker A: Where is the love?
[00:13:22] Speaker B: Egypt knows.
[00:13:23] Speaker A: Where is the love? Yeah, I know who did that. Who did that song? Where's the love? Black Eyed Peas.
[00:13:28] Speaker B: Yes.
Oh, that's a good one. Yeah. These are all so interesting. I've never actually dived into any of the aspects in the ways that other countries celebrate Valentine's Day. It's so commercial here. Over in the United States, it's gotten, you know, buy this piece of jewelry for your loved one. Buy this expensive box of chocolates to, you know, show your love. Where do we draw the line with that, though? You know, what's. Where do we draw that line between, you know, over consuming and genuinely expressing and showing your love for that special someone?
[00:14:06] Speaker A: Great question.
[00:14:07] Speaker B: And, you know, I don't have an answer for it, to be honest.
No, I mean, if you want to buy your love that expensive box of chocolates and that really nice piece of jewelry, then, Hunter Gent, my husband, you go ahead and do that. I will not put that against you. You go right on.
[00:14:25] Speaker A: Yeah, you do that, Hunter.
[00:14:27] Speaker B: Just kidding. That kind of leads us into, you know, how do you celebrate Valentine's Day? And, you know, it kind of looks different with my husband and I year to year. We just celebrated our sixth marriage anniversary. We've been together for years.
[00:14:41] Speaker A: Congratulations.
[00:14:42] Speaker B: It looks different for us every year. You know, some years we're inside, I think, eating Domino's pizza and watching rom com. Some years, you know, we actually take the time to make dinner reservations because those are hard to On Valentine's Day, truly. But this year, I don't think we have nothing special planned. I'm hoping for just a night on the couch watching the Gilded Age, eating pizza, you know. Yeah, just my comfort. A comfort date, really. Nothing fancy, but. How about you, Tom?
[00:15:08] Speaker A: Like, it's varied over the years. The girlfriend and I. I think last year we just kind of stayed home and watched a movie. This year, this is sort of a surprise, but she probably knows this by now. I'm planning to go to see the Knoxville Ice Bears play hockey at home on the. Either the 14th or the 15th. They're taking on the Huntsville Havoc. So, yeah, we're probably gonna. I'm probably gonna go out to dinner down there and watch hockey. So it will be a night of chocolates, romantic dinners, and on ice, violence. So, hey, you can't beat that at all. I don't think that's. That nothing says love like a forecheck into the boards in the second period.
[00:15:42] Speaker B: That sounds like a blast. Honestly, I've never been to a hockey game myself. Does it get cold in there?
[00:15:48] Speaker A: No, it's. I mean, you're on the rink and. Yeah, you wear, like, a sweater and a hoodie and they're the Ice Bears, by the way, so. The Knoxville Ice Bears. But no, it is super fun to see hockey in person. It's very exciting. Unbelievable speed. You've got some really top flight players out there. The crowd is super into it.
[00:16:06] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:16:07] Speaker A: If you want to go take your date to a hockey game. Go to go see a hockey game. Because it's super fun. But, yeah, that's the plan for this. For this Valentine's Day.
[00:16:15] Speaker B: I like that. That's a lot more exciting than our plans. What did I say? Gilded age, couch sitting and pizza.
[00:16:21] Speaker A: Oh, hey, we did that last year, I think.
[00:16:23] Speaker B: I've never been to a hockey game, so I'm gonna have to put that on my bucket list now. You've just sold me on going to a hockey game at this point, so well worth it.
[00:16:30] Speaker A: Well worth it.
[00:16:31] Speaker B: I don't know what team to support, but I don't. I don't have a favorite team, but figure it out. I guess Knoxville, since we're closest to them.
[00:16:37] Speaker A: Knoxville. The NHL team I always liked was the Pittsburgh Penguins. So there are many. Gosh, what would you call them? Totems, Traditions of Valentine's Day. Some are popular, some are not popular. Do you love it or leave it? Let's talk about a few of those candy hearts. Let's talk about this. First of all, there was. I don't know if any of you all remember the great Candy heart shortage of 2019, when the New England Confectionery Company closed. It closed in 2018. And this. And I'm talking about the small little hearts that are stamped that with like, be mine, I love you, miss you. Text me. There was an old one back in the 80s. They did. They stamped, called Fax me. Fax me, fax machine. If any of you remember what that is, please send us an email. The New England confectionery company called Nico, they closed in 2018. There were no candy hearts for Valentine's Day in 2019. It was a national outrage. I'll tell you. It truly was. It was a shocking thing. And they had like 10 and a half percent of the Valentine candy market, so it was a big deal. This was a pretty big deal. I'll source that from. I think the Economist measured that at the time from an article I read. Candy hearts stamped. Love it or leave it. Love them or leave them.
[00:17:50] Speaker B: Oh, gosh, they taste. Oh, they taste terrible to me, Tom. But they're so pretty.
So I'm gonna have to go with. Oh, I'm gonna go with love it because they are pretty. Maybe somewhat inedible to my taste palette, but my taste palette can be a little bit pompous. So I'm not even gonna put that into the equation here. They're pretty. They get the message out. I say love it. What about you?
[00:18:15] Speaker A: Yeah, I'm gonna say love it, too. Just because it's traditional. Just because they carry a. I think a memory. I think you're not necessarily eating the food. You're eating a memory. When you eat that of something that may have happened at some time in whatever relationship you may have been in, you're still kind of. You're eating a memory. That's how I would put it.
[00:18:33] Speaker B: I would describe it as eating chalk. But I like the eat memory much better. Eating memories.
[00:18:40] Speaker A: I guess. What is it? Is like sugar corn syrup and.
[00:18:43] Speaker B: Yeah, let's.
[00:18:44] Speaker A: Who knows what. But anyhow.
[00:18:46] Speaker B: Yeah. And you know, you know, human memory is closely associated, tied to smell and taste.
[00:18:51] Speaker A: Yes, that's right.
[00:18:52] Speaker B: So that makes a lot of sense that you'd say that, you know, Ooh. Lord knows what kind of memories that I'd get if I were to pop a candy heart in my mouth right now. I don't know. I've not had one in years. I haven't either, I think. So roses, maybe, like expensive roses from, like, a florist shop. Like, not the grocery store flowers, but, like actual roses. Pruned roses. Love it. Or Leave it. I'm gonna say leave it on that because I feel so bad watching flowers in a vase slowly die. I feel like a plant murderer. I don't know.
It's sad to me. Whereas, you know, roses are supposed to symbolize, like, love and your affection, and then to see them slowly wilt away, is that symbolic of your love and affection wilting away? I don't know. I'm getting really carried away with this.
[00:19:43] Speaker A: Oh, good metaphor, though.
[00:19:44] Speaker B: But I'd rather just leave them on the rose bush. Let them live out and, you know, enjoy their time in the sunshine and bring beauty to passersby and. I don't know. How do you feel about that?
[00:19:58] Speaker A: I would say leave it as well. I think roses growing on a rose bush out there in the wild is just, well, things in the wild. I prefer to see things in the wild. If you want to get flowers, why don't I get just wildflowers, like daisies, stuff like that? There's nothing wrong with wildflowers because they grow conspicuously. They're kind of everywhere. Yeah. I would have to leave the roses.
[00:20:16] Speaker B: Yeah, I agree.
[00:20:17] Speaker A: They like. For a lot of the reasons you said. There's something also symbolic about that.
[00:20:21] Speaker B: There is. Maybe. I just. Yeah, I did get carried away with that one, though, a bit. But I guess the box of chocolates, a Valentine's Day classic. Is that heart box containing the assorted chocolate pieces?
[00:20:33] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:20:33] Speaker B: I mean, that's an easy. Love it for me. Always going to love it and definitely going to be eating it. Box of chocolates. I couldn't imagine leaving it. What about you? Where do you stand?
[00:20:44] Speaker A: Love it. Chocolate, love. Valentine's Day. You cannot separate those. You gotta have it. You gotta have those.
[00:20:50] Speaker B: Yep. And then what about an expensive dinner, taking your loved one out on the town, having a nice fancy meal? Maybe somewhere. Somewhere in Johnson City, where we tried was really junipers, was pricey.
[00:21:03] Speaker A: Junipers.
[00:21:04] Speaker B: But it's so good.
They did. I mean, the chefs there did an amazing job with, you know, creating a very interesting menu. It was delicious. The flavors all work together. No matter what you got. I will always have to say love it, just because I do love trying new food, and I know there's a price on the artistry of, you know, creating the menus and experimenting with these different flavors and tastes and textures. So I'm going to say love it, but love it sparingly in my book.
[00:21:35] Speaker A: Yeah, I would love it. I would. I'm on the fence with this one. I would say love it because I think it's certainly worth doing and experiencing together. Something romantic and fun, I think, like cooking dinner on Valentine's night for, like, women or men? Men. You should probably learn how to cook.
[00:21:52] Speaker B: That's even more romantic.
[00:21:53] Speaker A: Yeah. I don't think that hurts. But you better know what you're doing because if you're gonna cook a romantic Valentine's dinner or have somebody cook it for you and have it brought in.
[00:22:02] Speaker B: Secretly, either way, you have to tell anybody. No corny Valentine's Day cards. I'm always going to love it. I love the corniness. Gosh. There have been some online in recent years, too. People, like, make memes out of them and they are just so funny. I can't think of one off the top of my head. I think one of my favorites. It was a Mean Girls one. It was a Mean Girls reference. It was like, you go, Glen Coco, when Glen Coco got the most candy canes.
[00:22:28] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:22:29] Speaker B: And my brain actually, while I was trying to come up with something to talk about for this episode, my brain thought, oh, they were celebrating Valentine's Day. But I was like, no, they did the Christmas dance. That wouldn't make any sense. It was a candy cane. At first I thought, you know, Glen Coco got the most Valentine's Day. It's been a while since I've seen Mean Girls, so forgive me, give me some lineance. But yeah, it was some corny Valentine's Day card about the, you know, Yuko, Glen Coco, you got a V Day card from me. Like, congratulations.
[00:22:56] Speaker A: Go Glenn Coco.
[00:22:57] Speaker B: Always loving it. I love, you know, anything puns, anything witty, anything to give you a giggle. Because I just want to giggle more in this life, you know, giggling is good for the soul. And that comes with corny Valentine's Day cards sometimes. But what's your take on that? Cringe or.
[00:23:15] Speaker A: I like them. Yeah. I like things that are witty but are also kind of straightforwardly dad joke driven kind of too.
[00:23:20] Speaker B: They're just like, oh, yes.
[00:23:23] Speaker A: The enjoyable part are people's kind of reactions to it even more than the joke, how they kind of take it. So, yeah, the corny Valentine's Day cards are always strong, I think.
[00:23:35] Speaker B: And then the social media post declaring your unwavering love, I'll say, leave it. Because I don't know, I write the cringiest love notes to my husband just about probably three times a week. You know, I don't need to post it. And, you know, he'll get it like on the kitchen counter or on the bathroom counter. I'll just place it at Random places around the house. But, you know, I'd rather put more energy into that, I think, than, you know, penning some deep and meaningful, like, novel to post on social media. Because everyone already knows, like, that's my boo every Valentine's Day. That's only once a year, though, so that's not even that bad. So, you know, I'm gonna say leave it for me personally, but I can also understand the people who do, you know, want to give their love a little shout out once a year. That's not bad at all. I think my irritation is with the, you know, every couple of days, it's almost kind of like, are you reminding yourself that you love them? Are you telling us every day, you know, kind of thing? But I don't know. That one's very controversial. That's the most controversial one of this list, honestly.
[00:24:36] Speaker A: Yeah. What are you doing the other 364 days? And I think that's very touching.
[00:24:40] Speaker B: Yeah. But if it's genuine, like, if you really, like, it's. You're over filled with love, and you've got to get it out there. Like, I don't. I don't judge, you know, go ahead. But, you know, just for me, I think that's gonna be a Leave it.
[00:24:54] Speaker A: I would say 100% leave it, run from it, kick it out of the car, don't go anywhere near it. Do not post anything like that on social media because, you know, you can might post something today and you know, she's going through your IG feed and it's like, oh, I see you bought the same sweater for this other undying love back in 2021.
[00:25:14] Speaker B: Problems, problems, problems.
[00:25:16] Speaker A: Does Ashley still have that sweater, too? So, yeah, I would say just avoid doing that. Yeah, completely. Because, well, social media, come on.
[00:25:25] Speaker B: Yeah. Nourish your relationship, you know, between you all and yes, watch it flourish. You know, now we're going to start to get into some counseling parts here, but I'll leave that for counseling services. They are the trained professionals, work on the healthy relationships.
[00:25:41] Speaker A: Go see counseling services. Absolutely.
[00:25:43] Speaker B: And now we can talk about those mandatory Valentine's Day parties in classrooms. I remember growing up, for me personally, that became a thing probably when I was around in middle school, where, you know, teachers would require, if you're going to bring Valentine's Day cards, bring one for everybody. But I remember in my earlier days, early 2000s and elementary school, late 90s, early 2000s, you know, not everyone would get a Valentine's Day card. You know, some. Some gals and some boys would just bring in some for their, you know, immediate friend group. And there's nothing wrong with that, but, you know, when you're, you know, a little human and, you know, discover what it means to human and make connections with other humans, you know, it can be kind of a punch in the gut to watch, you know, other people get all these cards and then you're not on the receiving end of anything. It hurts. It kind of takes the love right out of. Right out of Valentine's Day. But I remember eventually, maybe when I was around in middle school, the teachers would start to say, okay, well, if you're not going to bring one for everyone, don't bring one. So that everyone could get a card. Everyone could, you know, get a snack. But, you know, there were still those times where you would think it would, like, be like flashbacks of that one year where you didn't get anything. And what if you're the reason that, you know, they make it mandatory for everyone to receive, you know, of Valentine's Day, so there was still, like, that blanket of somewhat rejection over that in itself. So I'm gonna have to say leave it, Leave it, leave it. I don't know. Unless you yourself are hosting the Valentine's Day class and you have something for all your students, just opt for that, I think. But that's my opinion. What's your take on this, Tom?
[00:27:28] Speaker A: I wouldn't leave it to kids, because Valentine's Day, you kind of have this. This idea built up in your mind, even as kids. It's like, oh, it's like love and connectivity or connection, all this. And when it doesn't happen, it's like, especially at that age, it's kind of devastating. So I think it seems like our teacher, and I can't remember a lot of it now, but I think our teachers, like, gave everybody a Valentine.
[00:27:48] Speaker B: I remember that, too.
[00:27:50] Speaker A: Just so everybody would feel like they had a Valentine, something special. Yeah. But I would leave that as well. But then again, I think there were times that parents wanted to make a splash with their kids, saying, oh, look how amazing my child is with all these amazing things that we bought.
And that happened. That straight up happened.
[00:28:08] Speaker B: Oh, yeah. And it still happens.
[00:28:09] Speaker A: Oh, yes.
[00:28:10] Speaker B: It's always gonna happen, I think. But, yeah, I'm gonna have to say leave that one. Kick it to the dirt.
[00:28:17] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:28:17] Speaker B: Make everyone feel loved. You know, we all have something to give in this life, and we all have something that should be appreciated and that should be celebrated. I think absolutely it should. But the teachers let them take the Reign of that, because they know the dynamics in their classrooms better than the parents might. They're working with these children every day, so they know those dynamics. And I think if they were over the Valentine's Day celebrations and little gift giving, everyone's on the same playing field, so to speak. But, yeah, we have been through the history of Valentine's Day. We have talked about events that are happening on campus this month. We've talked about, you know, Valentine's Day traditions. Love it or leave it. What else is there to say on this day of love?
[00:29:11] Speaker A: Tell your special someone you love them every day. Not just on Valentine's Day.
[00:29:15] Speaker B: Agreed.
[00:29:16] Speaker A: But on every day. Because, you know, you really don't know what any day might bring. So, you know, leave those notes telling them how you feel, and always let them know how you feel about them. And certainly accept that from them as well, because, hey, there's no guarantee of tomorrow. So you gotta be. You gotta love every day, not just Valentine's Day.
[00:29:37] Speaker B: I agree, Tom. That was beautifully spoken. Life is so fragile. Not to try to get, you know, get real deep on you all, but actions speak louder than words. Show the people in your life how much you love them now. And that's. That's my take on that.
[00:29:54] Speaker A: Absolutely.
[00:29:55] Speaker B: So we're just gonna sidetrack here again.
[00:29:57] Speaker A: We're gonna talk about the five love languages, and I'm gonna do something about when we were talking about the expensive dinners. I've had a recurring dream for 30 years. We're gonna add in that. Okay.
[00:30:06] Speaker B: Oh, gosh, I want to know this one now.
[00:30:07] Speaker A: Okay. Yes.
[00:30:09] Speaker B: So the love languages, we can't talk about Valentine's Day without touching up on the five love languages.
[00:30:15] Speaker A: Absolutely.
[00:30:16] Speaker B: And mine were actually tied. I have two. Mine were words of affirmation and acts of service. Ooh. I think quality time was also very, very close.
So what were yours, Tom? Have you done that test?
[00:30:30] Speaker A: I have not. I've read some of the book, and I've skimmed it. But from the five I read, quality of time was mine because I just feel like time makes all the others possible. You have to set those blocks of time whether. Whether you're with that person or you're thinking about them, you gotta set that time. Time.
I don't know.
[00:30:51] Speaker B: Yes. I mean, you are right, though. Without time, we have nothing.
[00:30:55] Speaker A: So it's the one thing we can't halt. Change her.
[00:30:59] Speaker B: You're right.
[00:31:00] Speaker A: Misplace or just the place.
[00:31:02] Speaker B: I like that. And I've also heard some articles. I've seen this one article. I was like, why the five Love Languages is like a croc or something. I'm like, no. And I don't know. I don't know why I mentioned that because I don't know what the argument was on their side. I remember the article title made me so mad I didn't even click on. I was like, I'm just going to ignore this. Mine are words of affirmation and Acts of service. So, and, and let's see, how do you all express your love? What are your love languages? What are all of them? There's five. So there was Acts of Service, Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, Gift Giving, and Physical Touch. Okay, so Those are the five love languages. And it's a 1992 book by Gary Chapman, outlines five ways romantic partners express and experience love. Chapman refers to these as love languages, and he claims that each person has one primary and one secondary love language. So I guess my secondary was. Oh, I don't know which one was my primary and which one was my secondary. I forgot. But that's how they express love to each other and analyze what they complain about most often, what they request from their significant other most often. The author says that people tend to naturally give love in the way that they prefer to receive love.
[00:32:21] Speaker A: Oh, interesting.
[00:32:23] Speaker B: Yeah. And that reminds me of this one quote. And it was all over. I was a Tumblr girl back in my day. It was just a quote from a book, the Perks of being a Wallflower. And it was, you accept the love you think you deserve.
[00:32:37] Speaker A: Oh, that's profound. Yeah, that's.
[00:32:39] Speaker B: I think it was the Perks of being a Wallflower. And so now I've got to Google this because I don't want to. Incorrect. Yes, it was the Perks of being a Wallflower. So it was about an awkward teen guy just finding it. It was a coming of age novel about him making new friendships and connections in high school. And it was really. I don't know, I was a fan of the book and the movie, so. But that quote came to mind that we accept the love we think we deserve. So remember that.
[00:33:05] Speaker A: Absolutely.
[00:33:06] Speaker B: That's important.
[00:33:07] Speaker A: Very good advice.
[00:33:08] Speaker B: Don't accept anything else. And you know, each and every one of you listening, you deserve the best.
So never think any differently of yourself.
And just remember, you do accept the love you think you deserve. So, yeah, do what you will with that.
[00:33:25] Speaker A: Absolutely. Yeah. Don't ever forget that. That's 100% true. If I ever told you about the recurring dream, well, dream nightmare I have regarding Expensive romantic dinners. I've honestly, I've had this dream for 30 years or longer.
[00:33:40] Speaker B: Oh gosh.
[00:33:41] Speaker A: For real.
So I'm wandering around this forest. I'm with the girlfriend at the time. Although the girlfriend at the time. Here's the weird part, the girlfriend changes over the years. Anyway, I'm trying to get reservations at this insanely difficult to get restaurant to impress her, have this big night out, whatever. And you have to wait like a year to get these reservations. And honestly, the calendar is going by and I'm walking around and the sun is going round and round waiting for these reservations. And so you put on this waiting list and they send you where the restaurant even is in an envelope. And somehow I get this envelope and I'm driving, driving, we're driving, driving throughout in this countryside. And we come to this place and you walk through like this hobbit door and you open up and you go into this dark room and you open up another door and here's this huge restaurant that you've waited like a year to get. And you have to put like a bunch of money down even to walk through the door.
[00:34:36] Speaker B: Wow.
[00:34:36] Speaker A: I walk up to like the desk and the guy's there in a tuxedo. And the dining room is like the size of an aircraft carrier. I mean, that's how big it is. And there's like literally 3,000 empty tables. 3,000 empty tables. They're all white, they all have candles on them. And the guy looks at me in the girlfriend of disdain, looks back at the 1,000 empty tables, looks back at me and says, there's an hour wait. And I wake up screaming.
[00:35:01] Speaker B: That doesn't sound like a nightmare. That sounds like H E double hockey.
That feels awful.
[00:35:08] Speaker A: No, but it's like there's an hour wait.
[00:35:10] Speaker B: Eerie and ironic.
[00:35:12] Speaker A: And I wake up just. Yeah.
[00:35:14] Speaker B: Wow.
[00:35:14] Speaker A: I've had that dream probably ten times.
[00:35:16] Speaker B: Have you ever asked in your dream why?
[00:35:19] Speaker A: No, that's when it ends. That's where.
[00:35:21] Speaker B: Oh, it doesn't even give you the chance.
[00:35:24] Speaker A: No.
[00:35:24] Speaker B: Brain doesn't even give you the chance to work through the conflict it created.
[00:35:28] Speaker A: No, I need to have like a, like a. I don't know.
[00:35:30] Speaker B: Oh my gosh. You'll have to figure out how to, you know, lucid dream a little bit, but not wake yourself up. And then you need to ask this, like when you're making the reservation in your dream. I'm sorry, I'm trying to give you dream you advice here, but try to catch yourself in the dream. And when you're Making reservations.
Oh, my gosh. Well, I guess, you know, that's the thing about dreams, though. There's not logic to them. So, you know, even if you did ask, another problem would probably present itself and then morph into another recurring dream that you have for the next 30 years.
[00:36:04] Speaker A: Yeah, but if anybody knows what that dream means, Northeast State psychology people. Lisa. Lisa Poole. Anybody out there happens to know what this means, email me.
[00:36:15] Speaker B: Yeah, anyway, gosh, that sounds infuriating. I've had a couple of dreams like that myself, but it didn't have, like, it didn't have anything to do with Valentine's Day. So we're not going to hop into that right now, but I'm gonna have to connect with Lisa Poole and get her. Get her opinion on that.
[00:36:30] Speaker A: Yeah. Yeah.
[00:36:32] Speaker B: Interesting. Oh, my gosh. So it always ends right when they say you have to wait. So you've never actually gotten to experience this wonderful restaurant in your dream or nightmare?
[00:36:44] Speaker A: We might need a whole seance. And get Freud and Carl Jung to explain this one. I don't know.
[00:36:50] Speaker B: Get them all here, everybody.
[00:36:53] Speaker A: What's happening? So that's the Valentine's day episode for 2025 Friends. But remember, you deserve the love you get. The love you think you deserve, you feel you deserve. I'm paraphrasing that badly, but what was that again?
[00:37:08] Speaker B: You accept the love you think you deserve.
[00:37:11] Speaker A: Exactly. Remember that. And don't sell yourself short on Valentine's Day or any other day. Tell your loved ones or your loved one how much you care about them and love them every day. Love makes the world go round. Keep remembering that. As we sign off here on this episode of the Sound Barrier, we wish you a happy Valentine's Day, a happy spring, because spring is getting near. Enjoy Valentine's Day. Tell everybody about this episode. Leave a comment. You can subscribe to us at any of the places you get Downloads. Amazon Music, iHeartRadio, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Pandora. We're on them all. Check out all our episodes. Thank you for listening, and as always, we'll see you next time on the Sound.
